If you have gone through a middle aged divorce and are dating again, you may wonder if there is a book for you. The first book in my middle aged dating divorce process that I read was “He’s History and You’re Not”.
This is a great first book for women to read after a middle aged divorce although it gives some hard facts for over 40 women about the ratio of men to women in the dating world at our age. One hard fact that has stuck with me in particular is that by the time we are 60 there are two single women for every one single man due to a higher male mortality rate.
As you can see by age 60 there are 85,673 women for every 91,375 women. I don’t know who to feel more sorry for, the dead men or the single women. It just gets worse each year
The good news regarding that difference is that many post menopausal, post divorce women don’t want a man in their life anyways. After my divorce I joined some singles groups for middle aged women and met many women who felt that a man would be more work than fun. So I guess the imbalance is not so bad after all.
The other problem with over 40 dating is that men and women at this age don’t necessarily match for dating ranges. Women in their late 40s and 50s tend to have a dating range plus or minus a few years above and below their own age, whereas men the same age tend to have ranges that often go down 15 years to age 35 and don’t go above their own age very much. So for example a 50 year old women will be looking for men from 43 to 57 and a man the same age will be looking from 35 to 49.
This leads to men trying (and often succeeding) to date women much younger than them and leaves even fewer dateable men for late 40s and 50s women. This is probably why women this age tend to lie about their age (80% one study showed) and to hit on men at a ratio of 2 to 1 as compared to 1 to 17 for young women.
Middle aged dating at least gets you to nicer restaurants!
At this age persistence is the key. Most women remarry within 2 to 10 years, I read, depending on the source. This book, “He’s History and You’re Not”, says 2 to 4 years.
Overall I found this book, “He’s History and You’re Not”, down to earth, easy to relate to and funny. I highly recommend it.
Read more at Online Dating For Women Over 40: The Hopeful Woman’s 10 Step Guide to Enjoyment and Success